How One Parent Can Turn a Child Against the Other Parent
Parental alienation – a hot topic in family law and in the media – is the systematic alienation of a child from one parent, purposely caused by the other parent. The words and actions of one parent in effect poison the child against the other parent. Because of the special position of trust that a parent is in, this manipulation can unfortunately occur quite easily.
More and more, courts are being called on to review custody and visitation arrangements based on claims of parental alienation. Parents ask the court to consider the circumstances and modify the custody arrangement. In some states, it is unusual for primary physical custody to be modified based on interference with custody or visitation alone. Unusual, but not impossible (especially when programmed parental alienation can be proved). In other states, judges won’t hesitate to modify a custody order if he or she finds a custodial parent alienating the child from the non-custodial parent.
Some courts will enforce visitation primarily through contempt orders (and sometimes incarceration following a finding of contempt). In some cases though, the interference with the non-custodial parent’s relationship with the child is so severe that the court considers it to be a material change in circumstances to support a modification of custody. The court will generally have to find an adverse effect on the child and determine that the altered custody order was in the best interests of the child.
State statutes often outline the factors to be considered when determining the best interests of the child. Many times, in parental alienation cases, the court will find that the manipulation of the child has caused unhealthy emotional ties to the custodial parent.
If you are experiencing problems with custodial interference or parental alienation, you should discuss your legal options with an local family law attorney.
8 Comments
I am looking for an attorney who is willing to take on a parent alienation case in the state of Virginia. I have collected my own evidence & proof that my ex-husband & his wife have alienated my children purposely from me. My oldest child is now an adult and can provide confirmation of what is going on in their household.
Hi, Jennifer. If you’re looking for family law representation in Virginia, you may consider requesting a case review online to have a local attorney contact you, or searching our Yellow Pages directory to find a lawyer in your area whom you can contact immediately.
My children are being alienated from me and mentaly abused, but the only proof I have is what the kids tell me. The children have already told the Judge what is being said to them at there mothers house but she lies and says she don’t say those things. She lives with her Mother and they both call me names, death threats, threaten to beat me up, etc. All in front of the kids. My boys are 15 1/2 and 10. I have turned her in to Pa childrens services and they won’t do anything about it either unless there is physical abuse or a councelor calls them. I have told my boys councelor he could call them but he has not. What else can I do to protect my boys. They want to live with me but the Judge keeps giving her majority custody and never gives me a reason for his decision. She keeps hurting my boys by attacking me. She had an affair and left me and she tried to convince my boys that I had an affair too which I did not do, then 3 months after she left she tried to convince my boys I was committing adultery like she did. My boys love my girlfriend and won’t accept her boyfriend and the Judge still gave her majority custody even though the boys said they wanted 50/50 custody every other week with each of us. Why is our court system so un fair. I didnt cheat on my wife, I didn’t leave my family, and I have to pay for it all with the loss of the majority of my kids when they want to be with me and then I pay support that she doesn’t even use to support my kids. When they need something she tells them to ask me. Our Judge in Adams County, Judge Bigham has just sentenced my kids to a life of missery with there Mother and I feel he did not have the kids best interest at heart and is very byess to the mother and the fathers have no chance even though they are the better parent and provider. WHERE IS THE LAWS. She lied under oath in court to things that the kids have already told the Judge and should have been held in contempt but she wasn’t. She has been in contempt of court on at least ten occasions and nothing ever happens to her. If That were me I would probably be sent to jail. Our court system is very Predjidace against Fathers and it needs to be changed. I’ve always felt both parents deserve equal time unless there is a good reason they can’t and that Judge has no reason not to give me equal time with my kids. Can anybody help me in my situation. I’ve already spent 10,000.00 dollars in fees trying to get whats right and cannot afford to keep going like this. Are there any pro bono attorneys that might want to help me get my kids back to where they want to be. Please help me. My kids and I want and need each other,
Signed: a Father who has no faith in our system any more.
You should contact your local Bar Association or the American Bar Association Pro Bono Directory to find out if pro bono legal services are offered and if you qualify for those services.
You may also want to request that the court order an evaluation by a therapist/psychologist be conducted and that the therapist/psychologist provide the court with their custody recommendation.
i have joint custody of my two children ages 6 and 10. i am in a relationship and thinking about moving in with my boyfriend. what is the state law in Mississippi for cohabiting? my boyfriend and i aren’t going to get married right away but want to be together and me and my children love him very much.
My ex has physical custody without a court order. He recently moved to Oklahoma with out my knowledge or consent. He has not let me see her or speak to her in 2 1/2 years. Every time recently I have asked to speak to her, they tell me that she doesnt want to talk to or see me ever. Is this still considered parental alienation? And if so, what are my rights as the mother when there has been no court ordered custody?
I am looking for information for my fiancee who is supposed to have joint custody of his three children. Until a year ago, he had physical custody of his oldest son. That changed after a mediator insisted the boy go to his mother’s. Since then, she moved from Kansas to Oklahoma, did not provide him with her home address nor any information about the schools the children attend. She has not given him medical information, like when his younger son fell int a fire and was hospitalized, school information as when his older boy has been continually kicked out of school, etc. Now she has gone from moderate interfering with his rights to actively alienating him from the children by changing her home phone number, denying his spring visitation and refusing to allow him to see his children at all unless he takes various classes SHE feels are necessary, including drug/alcohol classes, even though she and her parents, who she lives with, were busted a few months ago with various drug related items in their home where the children reside. I could go on, but you see the point.
I fail to understand how she can get away with the many contempt of court charges against her when most people would have been arrested. The courts will not help him at all unless he gets a lawyer and fights her in court, yet if he’s behind in child support, the courts will go after him full throttle. Is there any justice in Kansas law? Is there any recourse for fathers being denied their rights to be a part of their children’s lives? The oldest wants desperately to come back to his father, but the mother will not even allow phone conversations. She actively tries to turn the kids against their father and will tell him the children do not want to see or speak to him when that is NOT the case. She has lied on court documents, effectively playing God to get back at him for imagined slights. She is out of control and the children are being hurt by this. We need help. Please.
I am 24 years old. I have 2 children,4 and 8.I adopted my wifes 8 yr old, from a previous relationship, after we were married.We had to get married and have been married for 4 years.We are having major problems and my wife is theartening divorce or leaving with the girls.We have no $, I just graduated from college with a teaching degree and have no job. I apply for all jobs but there is a hiring freeze. My wife did not graduate from high school and works at a Krogers gas station .I am scared to death of losing my girls.My wife is making life miserable for the girls & me, but I am afraid to stand up to her because of the reprcussions.She has already starting to alienate my family, by not letting them see the girls. My family has given us a house to live in and has supported us both financially and emotionally. I live in Wood county,West Virginia and just need to know my rights.Any advice would be appreciated.